As I said last time, there is some wonderful food in Canada. Take Tim Horton’s, for example. The donuts are awesome! The coffee is great! But I’m not here to talk about this stuff. I’m here to talk about the real food: the kind you don’t really see.
When I entered Canada for the first time this year, my family stopped at this little place called Bob’s Bar and Grill in Hamilton, Ontario. It was a really quaint little place. The Olympics were on, my family was talking, it was all good fun. I got this thing called the “I Am Canadian” burger. (Disclaimer: I am not actually Canadian.) This thing was wonderful. There was burger meat (obviously), corned beef, Canadian bacon, pickles, mustard, and lettuce. It was really good. Every bite was something new and unique. This burger, plus the great atmosphere, made my first Canadian encounter top-notch. There was a hair on my plate, but i guess that’s just part of the ride.
Before our big-ticket item, I would like to take a moment to recognize my uncle’s cooking (unlike me, he is Canadian). His scrambled eggs, in particular, are really awesome. He just knows how to cook some “scrams,” as they call it.
Well, that’s enough of my ranting. Let’s get to what you really want to hear about:
You may think I’m hyping this up too much, but I’m not. This is basically a Nova Scotian garbage plate. This thing is so good. It’s like a taco, but not a taco, and it’s like pizza, but not. This is something so unique and insane I wish they existed outside of Canada. And I checked: they are only in Canada.
The base of the donair is made with Lebanese-style pita bread. Next is the donair meat. This is made from ground beef, pepperoni, salami, and pork, with gigantic portions of each. This meat is heavily spiced and flavored. They do this really well. If they don’t, the shop probably ends up out of business. This meat is covered in tomatoes and raw onions. This is all topped with a sauce made of milk, vinegar, garlic powder, and sugar (it sounds nasty, but it really isn’t). The pita bread is then wrapped around this meaty mass like a burrito. Eat it quickly, though. The juices will seep into the bread and cause it to fall apart, so snag this fleeting treat before it destroys itself in front of you.
When I got this for the first time, I died. I really did. There was an absolute explosion of flavor in my mouth. The meat and sauce fit together perfectly, creating a tangy, sugary, meaty taste that honestly sounds nasty, but is actually quite fantastic. I got the deluxe donair (because why not go all out, right?), which, somehow, had more meat.
You know, I was supposed to share with my siblings.
I did not. One bite, and I knew this was an experience for me and me only to have. So, of course, I ate it all. But this is irrelevant. So, there is the donair, a wonderful, flavorful, well, thing.
I would also like to add a little bit about this rack of lamb that I had in Toronto. Perfectly spiced, perfectly cooked, I was gnawing on those bones for longer than I should have. Lamb in general is really a wonderful food. If you haven’t tried it, try it. But what do I know? I can’t taste with half of my tongue.
So, you guys have heard about the “I Am Canadian” burger, my uncle’s scrams, the donair, and a rack of lamb. These food items, seemingly “lame” because they’re “Canadian,” are nothing of the sort. If anything, Canada is way more creative than America with respect to food. But I always love a little American comfort food, like a garbage plate or some greasy fries. Still, these foods are absolutely worth crossing the border for. I urge you guys to grab a donair next time you are in Canada.
Tune in next time to learn about some epic rafting on the Bay of Fundy in “My Canadian Experience Part 3: Tidal Bore Rafting.” Thanks for reading!